This is the preface of the first edition of
Managing Differences: How to Build Better Relationships at Work and Home
by Daniel Dana, Ph.D., which is used as a sourcebook for workplace mediation training seminars.
For more information contact the Mediation Training Institute International.
Interest in conflict resolution has burgeoned in recent years. We professionals in this emerging field, like specialists in other disciplines, talk to each other a lot. We write articles, publish scientific journals, hold conventions- and produce books. These efforts have created an extensive body of knowledge available to mediators and academicians.
But I fear we have lost sight of whom we are serving.
Differences in attitudes, values, priorities, lifestyles, perceptions and interests occur in every meaningful relationship – in our workplaces, families and communities. These differences often give rise to conflicts that hurt our loved ones, our organizations, and ourselves. But rarely are these conflicts brought to a mediator for resolution. We do the best we can on our own.
Where can the non-specialist turn for practical help in managing day-to-day differences with others?
This book offers a simple tool to all of us who work or live with other people. Self Mediation is not intended for mediators, consultants or researchers, although it may provide insights to their work. This tool is designed for people who do not aspire to becoming mediators, and who may not choose to bring their disputes to mediators for solution. It is for people who want more satisfaction and value from their workplace and personal relationships. It is for people who desire an alternative to coercion ("power-plays") and distancing ("walk-aways") as strategies for coping with interpersonal- differences. It is for people who recognize the importance of working at relationships, and who want to prevent differences from leading to destructive conflict. Perhaps it is for you.
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